Our group is standing tall, never will we fall
It's been a challenge, to prove it to all
Some people critize, as we rise
Some people envy, some people chide
We never worry, from dusk to dawn
As our united hearts, stroll along
Priceless fights, to our surprise
Taught us the values of life, that we realised
Some people curse, some people dont
I still wonder ???
We are eternal friends, they havn't known...
4 comments:
lovellllyyyy !!! i lov it !! :) :) :)
romba santosham mama....:)
Super one.. I see that you are improving day by day with every poem of yours. Try to pay more attention to the punctuations. For instance the usage of commas, etc...
On this poem, i really liked your usage of words.
"Some people curse, some people dont". On this line, I feel it is a little out of place. Why would people curse you and why would they not ?? It doesnt really fit in this friendship context. Try using some other idea here for this line alone. Otherwise the poem looks great. Good going.
- Tilak
yea punctuations need to b taken care....they change the meanin if used wrongly....n will try editin the line u hav told....
will update the blog soon wit another one..keep chkin bro
cheers
'vivek'
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